• Blog Stats

    • 105,007 people have looked at this crap.

  • Look who's talkin'

    Jeffrey C on Guide to Being a Bad Fan
    Steve on Guide to Being a Bad Fan
    Grundy on Guide to Being a Bad Fan
    Gothjet on Boy Scouts Leave Me Alone…
    bronsonfive on Woo Hookers!
    I’ll Buy That … on Woo Hookers!

  • The old blogs...

  • a

  • RSS Don't Eat the Worm

    • Cancer Free, The Way to Be January 17, 2008
      More proof that beer is good for you.  Researchers in Germany say that a cancer-fighting substance found in hops could be enhanced to brew a special anti-cancer beer. I don’t think I’ve read a better story all year. I know the year is young, but the only news that could be better would be “Drinking on the [...]
    • Flaming Shot January 10, 2008
      The flaming shot. It’s an amateur move for sure, but it looks cool. The problem is that a lot of people don’t know how to take this shot. They can make it, and light it on fire and that’s where their “smartness” ends. Example 1 This dude is not smart. And the chick that says “Oh my [...]
    • Don’t Just Drink it January 8, 2008
      We all love beer right? RIGHT!? Well not only is beer delicious and good for you, but it can be used for all sorts of things that aren’t drinking related. Here is the story. Below I have chosen some of my favorites; CLEAR UP BROWN SPOTS IN YOUR LAWN According to Andrew Lopez, a professional gardener, the fermented [...]
    • A Drink a Day Keeps the Doctor Away January 3, 2008
      Health benefits from alcohol? Damn right! According to scientists (not just random drunk people anymore), alcohol in moderation is actually good for you. They say that one alcoholic drink a day will help with all kinds of stuff. Your heart Your pancreas Your Joints Your over all health Sometimes I like to combine 2 weeks worth of 1 beer a day [... […]
    • About Bloody Time January 2, 2008
      After a night of hard drinking you will wake up either drunk or hung-over. Being drunk is not the problem, it’s the coming down from being drunk and being hung-over that is the problem. The solution; a Bloody Mary. There are 3 types of morning drinkers. There is the person who drinks a Bloody Mary, a person [...]
    • DWI of the Year January 1, 2008
      Here at Don’t Eat the Worm we don’t condone drinking and driving. It is a dumb and reckless move that can cost not only you your life but an innocent person. (Not saying you’re guilty.) BUT Meagan Harper is now a god in DWI/DUI circles. She was busted in Oregon with a .55 BAC. The legal limit [...]

  • RSS My Thursday night radio show

    • An error has occurred; the feed is probably down. Try again later.

Horse Face and the Sea Turtles

Posted on June 2, 2008 by Steve

Sex in the City became a movie this weekend, much to the disappointment of penis’ everywhere. It was fine when these old ugly chicks were on small TVs, but now they are on 25 foot screens.

I discussed, more like yelled about how shitty this movie is, with some girls I work with. None of them would agree with me that these chicks are as far from attractiveas they could possibly be. They would try to tell me that so-and-so is hot and a slut, but they would use their Sex in the City name so I’d have no idea who they were talking about. My head almost exploded. 

Seriously, who wants to see shriveled up old hags on a huge ass screen hooking up with dudes? Not me, I’ll tell you that. They should use this movie in Guantanamo to torture the terrorists, they would tell everything they knew after five minutes of this shit fest.

Some would say, “Steve how can you hate a movie you’ve never seen?”

To which I’d reply, “If I want to see horses I watch horse racing. At least then I can gamble on the outcome.”

I’d rather not have sex if those four broads were my choices.

 

Filed under: Angry, Blogging, Celebrities, Entertainment, I Hate..., Movies, Random, Rant, Sports betting, Stupid, TV | Tagged: , , , , , ,

« We’re Going to Need a Bigger Boat Over-rated Michael J. Fox »

13 Responses to “Horse Face and the Sea Turtles”

  1. Allison, on June 2nd, 2008 at 8:54 pm Said:

    Really? OK, so I do think that SJ Parker may possibly be THE ugliest woman alive, I think “Charlotte” (whatever her real name is…) is extremely pretty.

    *waits for King Steves head to explode*

  2. Fast Eddie, on June 2nd, 2008 at 10:14 pm Said:

    You’ve just made quote of the week with your horse racing comment. Absolute brilliance sir.

  3. hierophant4582, on June 2nd, 2008 at 11:20 pm Said:

    I never watched the show, but I still hate it. i can’t stand when girls mimick the bull shit they see on TV. Especially this gay ass shit.

  4. Steve, on June 3rd, 2008 at 7:10 am Said:

    Allison - No…NONE of them are “pretty.”

    Fast Eddie - Wooo! I love quote of the week!

    Hierophant - Girls should mimick pornos more, but not soft core ones.

  5. hierophant4582, on June 3rd, 2008 at 7:28 pm Said:

    I’d rather them mimick soft core porn than Sex in the City.

  6. Pure Evyl, on June 3rd, 2008 at 7:45 pm Said:

    I’d do the blonde but then again that ain’t saying much.

  7. bronsonfive, on June 4th, 2008 at 1:36 pm Said:

    I couldn’t agree more. These are some of the ugliest bitches on the planet.

  8. romi41, on June 11th, 2008 at 10:32 pm Said:

    Hahaha…I watched this movie on opening night and would love to see it a few more times…but then again I don’t have to think about the idea of banging them and throwing up afterwards, so it’s a lot easier for me ;-)

  9. Jeffrey C, on June 12th, 2008 at 11:45 pm Said:

    Try it, I am sure that you will be shocked by the results!

  10. aniche, on June 26th, 2008 at 2:22 am Said:

    now i feel ashamed of all the wanks i had looking at them!
    :(

  11. Lisa, on August 13th, 2008 at 5:59 pm Said:

    hahaha, they are definitely unattractive and old.

  12. PokerBrit, on December 4th, 2008 at 7:44 pm Said:

    HA! This is really funny

  13. Steve, on December 5th, 2008 at 4:35 pm Said:

    Heh. Thanks.

Leave a Reply